


Should I Stay or Should I Go

by didntwanderstillgotlost



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Baker!Dean, Friends to Lovers, Idiots in Love, M/M, slowburn, writer!Cas
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-18
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-13 23:56:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29534397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/didntwanderstillgotlost/pseuds/didntwanderstillgotlost
Summary: When Cas left home in the middle of the night, he didn't really have a plan. He just needed to leave. When he ended up in Lebanon, Kansas, he only planned on staying for a few days. He didn't count on a town full of kind, generous people, and a certain green-eyed baker who was always giving him free baked goods.Dean has always wanted to travel, but he can't stand the idea of leaving his hometown forever. He's never been able to find someone who understands that, and most of the people who come to Lebanon don't stay, so he's sworn off serious relationships. Until a drifter with blue eyes and a caffeine addiction makes himself at home in his coffee shop.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Kudos: 19





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I was gonna wait to start posting this, but thanks to snow and ice and a horrible management company, I haven't been able to get out of my apartment complex for three days and I'm bored. So, here we are. I hope you all enjoy!

Cas stared out the window and watched the world moving outside. Buses had never been his favorite form of transportation, but it was the cheapest option. As he watched the Kansas landscape zip by, he thought about all the choices he’d made that had led him to this point. That had led him to pack a bag and leave in the middle of the night without looking back. Maybe he should feel guilty about it, but he didn’t. He was done feeling guilty. He was done being the scapegoat. He needed a fresh start and this was the only way. 

When the bus pulled into the station, Cas got off and stared up at the sky for a moment. Middle of Nowhere, Kansas. It was as good a place as any to start over. He shouldered his duffle and went in search of a motel. The town was nice. Quaint. He felt himself start to relax for the first time in a long time. As he walked, he noticed a few people giving him odd looks, but in a town this small, everyone probably knew everyone. He found the motel, got a room, and headed upstairs.

Once he was settled, he went in search of coffee. Luckily, the girl at the front desk, Becky, was able to point him in the right direction. He followed her directions and five minutes later, he found himself standing outside a little coffee shop. He smiled when he opened the door and was hit with the scent of fresh-baked pastries.

“Welcome to Harvelle’s!” the redhead behind the counter said brightly. “Hey, you’re new! I’m Charlie. What can I get you?”

“The biggest coffee you have, with cream and sugar, and one of whatever it is I’m smelling.” Charlie grinned.

“Coming right up. Are you just passing through, or staying put?”

“Haven’t decided yet. But if everyone here is as nice as you, I think I might stay.”

“You should. This town is awesome.” She handed Cas his change. “So, what’s your name?”

“Cas.”

“Short. Simple. Good. Well, like I said, I’m Charlie. Spock ears over there is Dorothy. Kevin’s our coffee guy, Ash and Benny are our cooks, and Dean’s our baker.” Someone behind Charlie cleared their throat. Charlie turned and rolled her eyes, but the smile never left her face. “Right, and that’s Jo. She runs this place.”

“Charlie, stop scaring the new guy and go help Dean.” Charlie stuck her tongue out, but ducked into the kitchen. Jo smiled at Cas. “Sorry about her. She gets excited when she meets new people.” Cas smiled.

“It’s fine. She’s very nice.”

“New to town or passing through?”

“Not sure yet.”

“Well, if you decide to stay and you need a job, you’re more than welcome here.”

“Thank you,” Cas said, slightly caught off guard. He’d barely been in town twenty minutes and he was apparently already making friends. That was probably a good thing. Jo handed him his coffee and a pastry that looked like it was filled with something cherry flavored. He thanked her again and left. He really hadn’t planned on staying here more than a few days, but if Jo was offering him a job, maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad thing to stick around for a little while and save up some money.

When he got back to his motel room, he sat on the bed and opened up his laptop. He had a ton of unread emails, but he chose to ignore them. He was starting over. That meant he was leaving the entirety of his old life behind. He went through each email account and deleted them, then opened a new one. He deleted all the contacts he wouldn’t need anymore and sighed happily. Then he opened up a blank document and got to work.

Four hours later, he was pulled out of a deep dive into a Wikipedia wormhole when his phone buzzed in his pocket. He pulled it out and glanced at the screen. He still had to change his number, but he’d blocked all the people he didn’t want to talk to anymore. He unlocked his phone and checked the message.

**Gabe [6:14pm]:** So that’s it? You just up and left without a word to anyone? Without a word to me? I thought we were closer than this.

Cas’s heart twisted a little. Gabriel was his favorite brother, but he couldn’t tell anyone, not even him. If he’d said anything, Gabriel would’ve begged him to go to California and he wasn’t ready for that yet.

**Cas [6:15pm]:** I’m sorry Gabe. I had to leave. I’ll tell you where I am once I’m settled. As long as you promise not to tell anyone else. I needed a fresh start.

 **Gabe [6:16pm]:** You still should’ve said something to me.

 **Cas [6:16]:** I know. I’m sorry.

 **Gabe [6:17]:** Sure 

Cas sighed. Now he felt bad. He set his phone on the bed beside him and closed out the Wikipedia page. He looked at the document he’d been working in. As usual, he spent more time researching than he did actually writing. He chuckled to himself. He could move to a different state and start his life over, but some things would never change.


	2. Chapter 2

“Dean, you just missed the _cutest_ guy,” Charlie gushed as she walked into the kitchen. Dean looked up from the cookie dough he was mixing and narrowed his eyes.

“Thought you were gay, Red?” Charlie rolled her eyes.

“Just I’m not gonna order doesn’t mean I can’t look at the menu. Jo sent me in here to help you, so what do you need me to do?”

“Start greasing cookie sheets.” Dean nodded over at the stack of cookie sheets. “So, who’s the guy?”

“He’s new here. Name’s Cas and seriously, Dean, he’s gorgeous. You’d like him.”

“How do you know? You just met him.” Charlie shrugged.

“I can just tell. He said he’s not sure if he’s gonna stick around, but I hope he does.” Dean hummed noncommittally. It wasn’t that he minded new people, but he liked Lebanon the way it was. People drifted in and out all the time, but no one new had moved to town permanently in a while and he liked that. He and Charlie put the cookies in the oven. Dean set the timer and then folded his arms loosely.

“So, tell me about the book.” Charlie’s eyes lit up and started gushing about the new book she’d gotten by her favorite author. Dean would never admit it out loud, but he kind of liked the books, too. They were romance novels, which weren’t really his thing, but these ones were…different. He couldn’t quite figure out what it was, but they read differently than most romance novels and he liked them.

“Oh my, God, Dean it’s amazing. I mean, better than usual. The plot, the characters, everything! I can’t even explain it! Words don’t do it justice. You just have to read it.”

“Well, hand it over as soon as you’re done then.”

“I will. I don’t know why you can’t just buy your own copy.”

“One, I have nowhere to keep books, and b, it’s just easier to borrow it and return it. And no spoilers.”

“Obviously. I wish I could meet the author. They must be so fascinating.”

“You know their life is probably nothing like the characters’ lives, right? They probably write all that while sitting on their couch in their pajamas.” Charlie sighed wistfully.

“Still, imagine being with someone with that kind of imagination. Imagine how romantic they’d be. I wish I could find that.” Dean rolled his eyes.

“You’re twenty-three, Red. You’ve got time.”

“Yeah, and no way out of this stupid town.”

“Come on, it’s not so bad here.”

“Little hypocritical, coming from the mouth of the man who, quote “wants to see the world”, dontcha think?”

“Just because I wanna see the world doesn’t mean this is a bad place to live. It just means I want a change of scenery sometimes.”

“Whatever, Winchester.”

“Wanna go with me next time I go visit Sam?”

“Maybe. I still can’t believe your brother ditched us for Stanford.”

“Yeah, I know, but that kid’s gonna be a great lawyer.” Dean had been a little upset when his little brother told him he wanted to go to college in California, but the truth of the matter was, he was really proud that Sam had gotten into Stanford.

“Yes, he is. And I still don’t understand why you didn’t move with him. You’re always saying you wanna leave. You had the perfect opportunity.”

“I know, but I couldn’t leave you guys. And Sam needs me to help pay for school. I like my job here and I like you guys. Maybe I’ll move out there with him after he graduates.”

“Will you take me with you?” Dean smiled.

“Of course, Charlie.” Charlie returned his smile. Really, Dean was probably never going to leave Lebanon. He would visit Sam from time to time, but this town would always be home. Even if it was boring sometimes. The timer went off and Dean checked the cookies. He pulled four trays out of the oven and put in four more.

“Sometimes I swear you’re baking for a small country.”

“What can I say? People love ‘em.”

“We should open a bakery.”

“Why?” Dean asked. “I love working here. Ellen and Jo are like family. You all are. Why open my own business when I can get a paycheck _and_ help my friends?” Charlie shrugged.

“Just a suggestion. Maybe if you ever actually do move out to Cali.”

“Maybe.” Jo yelled for Charlie and she ducked out of the kitchen, leaving Dean alone with his cookies.

*** *** ***

By the time Dean clocked out, he was tired, but happy. He was probably one of the only people in the world who liked his job. Living in a small town was like that. Everyone was nice to each other. Or maybe it was just living in Lebanon. Either way, Dean never really had a bad day at work and he was grateful for that. He unlocked his apartment above the cafe. After his dad died, he inherited the house, but once Sam left for college, it all seemed like too much. The house was empty. Nothing there, but ghosts of memories, both good and bad. So he sold it and Ellen offered to rent him the apartment above the cafe at half price. She was good like that.

Everyone in Lebanon was good. For the most part.

Dean raided his fridge for a beer then turned on the TV and sat on the couch with his feet up on the coffee table. The apartment was a studio, but he didn’t mind. It was just him. And occasionally whoever he’d hooked up with the night before. He wasn’t the commitment type, but he also wasn’t the type to kick people out as soon as they were done. Most of his guests stayed the night and were sent packing after breakfast. Dean was nothing if not a good host.

His mind wandered back to what Charlie had said earlier. Maybe the new guy would make his visits to the coffee shop a regular thing. He trusted Charlie’s judgment on the man’s level of attractiveness, but he was hesitant to take her word that he would like him. Sometimes Charlie only saw what she wanted to and, at the moment, she probably only saw that Dean had hit a dry spell in his dating life. It didn’t bother him so much, but he knew his best friend wanted him to be happy.

Dean was happy, for the most part. He would be lying if he said he didn’t miss being in a real relationship, but he had tried that and it hadn’t worked out, and he wasn’t ready to try again. He _was_ willing to make a new friend though.


	3. Chapter 3

Cas had been in town for a week and Charlie seemed to have latched onto him. She always had his coffee ready before he got to the cafe, along with whatever pastry Dean made that morning. Dean was becoming more and more of a mystery every single day. He hadn’t met the man yet, but Charlie practically waxed poetic about him every day. If she hadn’t told him she was gay, he would’ve thought she was in love with him. Maybe she was, platonically anyway. Cas was starting to get intrigued, though. He wanted to meet Dean, but he couldn’t just come out and say that. It would be weird. So every day, he went to Harvelle’s and sent up a silent prayer that Dean wouldn’t be holed up in the kitchen.

His wish came true halfway through the second week. He walked in and wasn’t greeted with Charlie’s overly enthusiastic shout. Instead, he was greeted with sandy brown hair, playful green eyes, and a warm, genuine smile.

“Welcome to Harvelle’s. You must be Cas.” Cas furrowed his brow slightly.

“Yes. And you are?”

“Dean,” the guy said, holding out his hand. “Sorry. Charlie’s gone on and on about you, I feel like I already know you.” Cas smiled and shook Dean’s hand.

“Likewise. It’s good to finally put a face to the name.”

“Agreed. Also nice to put a face to the order. Charlie’s off today and she told me to make sure your coffee and pastry were ready at ten sharp.” Cas could feel the blush creeping up his cheeks.

“She really didn’t have to go to all that trouble. I don’t mind waiting. Thank you, though. And tell her I said thank you if you see her before I do.”

“Will do. Have a good day, Cas.”

“You, too, Dean.” Cas took his coffee and pastry and headed back to the motel. He was determined to get some actual work done today. He’d spent the last week and a half falling into Wikipedia wormholes while doing research instead of actually writing. It wasn’t his fault. Well, maybe it was. His characters were boring and his plot was clichéd. He was running out of ideas and his work was suffering. He had to keep reminding himself that he wasn’t on a deadline anymore.

He sat on his bed and opened his laptop. A blank document stared back at him. He sipped his coffee and decided he would probably have better luck making an outline first. As he worked, his mind wandered to Dean. Now that he had a face to go with the name, he understood why Charlie liked him so much. They had only spoken for a few minutes, but Cas could tell he was a good person. He had been around enough fake nice people over the years to know the genuine thing when he saw it. He hoped he would see Dean more in the future. His phone pinged in his pocket.

He took it out and looked at the screen.

**Gabe [10:27am]:** Where are you?

 **Cas [10:28am]:** Not yet

 **Gabe [10:28am]:** Cas I wanna see you 

**Cas [10:29am]:** I know and I wanna see you too but I’m not sure if I’m staying here or not. Let me figure myself out and then I’ll call you. I promise.

 **Gabe [10:30am]:** You better

Cas put his phone on the nightstand. He hated the way he left, but he couldn’t tell Gabriel he was leaving. He would’ve tried to stop him and Cas had to get out. He did miss his brother and he wanted to see him, but not until he was sure where he was settling. He liked Lebanon, but he had never considered himself a small-town kind of person. He would stay here for a few months and maybe pick up some work at Harvelle’s for a little extra cash, but he probably wouldn’t settle here.

He worked on his outline for three hours before heading back to Harvelle’s for lunch. He was hoping to run into Jo so he could talk to her about employment. He was pleasantly surprised to see Dean leaning against the counter, talking to an attractive redhead. He glanced at the door and grinned when he caught Cas’s eye. Cas smiled back. Dean wrapped up his conversation, then said,

“Hey, Cas. Just can’t stay away, huh?”

“What can I say? I’m a sucker for cherry filling.” Dean laughed.

“Guess that makes us kindred spirits. What can I get you? Besides a cherry turnover.”

“Well, what’s good? Charlie usually likes to surprise me.” Dean smiled fondly.

“Well, I’m partial to the bacon cheeseburger. Best bacon cheeseburger in the state if you ask me, but I guess I’m a little biased.”

“I’ll take one, then. And a side of fries.”

“Great. Can I interest you in a milkshake?”

“Mm, maybe. Let’s see if the burger holds up first.”

“You won’t be disappointed, I promise. I’ll bring it out when it’s ready.”

“Thank you, Dean.” Cas took the open table near the window. He usually took his food back to his motel room so he could work while he ate, but he needed a break. He was staring out the window, watching the world go by, and he didn’t notice when a cup of coffee was placed in front of him. He looked at it then looked up to find Jo standing beside him. She smiled.

“Hey, Cas. Got a second?”

“Uh, yes, sure.” Jo sat in the chair across from him. “So, how are you liking it here so far?” Cas smiled.

“I like this town. It’s nice.”

“You think you’re gonna stick around for a while?”

“Maybe. Why?”

“We need a server, bad. Charlie, Kevin, and Dean are busting their asses trying to do too many jobs at once whenever Dorothy isn’t here. Any chance you want a job?”

“I mean, I’d love to, but I don’t have any experience serving. Unless you count the summer I worked at an ice cream stand so my brother could get free ice cream.” Jo chuckled.

“Can you read and hold a plate while walking?”

“Yes.”

“Then you can do this job. We’re not a chain restaurant and we’re busy for a small-town business, but it’s not crazy. We don’t need a professional, we just need someone with at least one functioning brain cell. Please?” Cas smiled.

“Sure.”

“Great! Any chance you can start tomorrow?”

“Yes, I can do that. What time do you need me here? I’m usually up around nine.”

“If you can be here by ten, that’d be awesome. I’ll go make you a name tag. And thanks, Cas.

You’re a lifesaver.”

“Jo, stop harassing the new guy,” Dean said. He slid a plate in front of Cas. “She’s not bothering you, is she?” Jo rolled her eyes.

“Don’t you have a job to be doing?”

“Actually, I was gonna take my break, if that’s okay with you.” “Whatever, Winchester.” Jo got up and smiled at Cas. “Thanks again.” “You’re welcome.” Dean watched her leave then raised an eyebrow.

“What was that about?”

“Apparently, I have a job now.” Dean grinned.

“Oh, that’s awesome! We’ve been needing a server for a while,” Dean took the chair Jo had been sitting in, “and you seem nice. Charlie likes you, anyway.” Cas chuckled.

“Seems like Charlie likes everyone.” Dean shrugged.

“For the most part. So, you gonna try the burger?” Cas tilted his head a little.

“You’re gonna sit there and stare at me until I do, aren’t you?” Dean smirked.

“Maybe.”

“Well, maybe I’ll wait you out, then. Your break only lasts so long.”

“You act like I can’t do my job and stare at the same time.” Cas laughed.

“All right, you win this round.” He picked up the burger and took a bite. “Oh my, God.”

“Good?”

“I think I’m in love.” Dean laughed.

“Told ya. I’ll leave you to your burger. Let me know if I can get you anything else.”

“Thought you were on your break?” Dean shrugged then smiled before getting up and walking away. Cas watched him go back behind the counter and smiled to himself. He was going to like working with Dean.


	4. Chapter 4

“You’re late, Winchester!” Charlie said the second he walked in the door. He rolled his eyes and smiled.

“By two minutes. I still have plenty of time before we open.” He walked behind the counter

and dropped a kiss on her head before putting his apron on. “So, Jo tell you she hired a server?” “No, but thank god. We need one. Who’d she hire?” “Cas.” Charlie’s eyes lit up.

“Seriously!? Oh my, God, yes! I love him!” She paused. “Wait, that means you met him!” Dean nodded, smiling a little as he gathered ingredients. “Well!? Was I right, or was I right!?

He’s cute right!?” Dean chuckled.

“Yes, Charlie, he’s cute. I’d even say gorgeous. He’s nice and he can keep up with my banter.

He’s gonna be awesome to work with.” Charlie raised an eyebrow.

“That’s it?” Dean cracked a couple eggs into a bowl and grabbed a whisk.

“Yeah. That’s it. He seems nice enough, but he’s new here. And I’m not gonna make assumptions.” Dean caught Charlie’s eye roll. “Dude, come on.”

“You come on. We don’t even know if he’s gonna stick around. People don’t move here, Red. They drift in and out, and I prefer it that way.” Dean measured out some flour. “I’m a flirt, you know that, but I’m not gonna put an investment into someone who probably won’t be here more than a few months.”

“Whatever. You want some help?”

“Sure.”

By the time everyone else showed up around nine, Dean had knocked out three dozen scones. He set aside two cherry ones, three blueberry ones, and two chocolate ones for himself and his coworkers, then arranged the rest in the display case. The first hour was usually slow, so Dean poured himself a cup of coffee and munched on his scone. Charlie spent most of the time leaning against the counter, flirting with Dorothy; Kevin got to work perfecting his latest, unnecessarily sugary coffee drink that Dean would always pretend he didn’t like; Benny was firing up the grill; and Jo was printing out the paperwork Cas would need to sign when he got there. Dean smiled to himself as he watched his friends. Around a quarter to ten, Charlie got started on a cup of coffee.

“He’s coming in to _work_ today,” Dean reminded her. She shrugged.

“Doesn’t mean he’s not gonna want his coffee. I mean, you set aside a scone for him, so.”

Point.” Dean’s eyes flitted to the door. Charlie smirked.

“Yeah, you totally don’t have a crush on him.”

“Shut up.” Really, he didn’t. Cas was cute and he was witty. They would definitely be good friends, but Dean wasn’t going to pursue anything more than that with someone who wouldn’t be around very long. There was no point. His phone buzzed in his pocket, giving him an excuse not to look at Charlie.

 **Sammy [9:52am]:** Hey

 **Dean [9:53am]:** Hey Sammy what’s up?

 **Sammy [9:53am]:** Just checking in. It’s been a few months.

 **Dean [9:54am]:** Everything’s pretty much the same here. How’s school going?

 **Sammy [9:55am]:** Good so far. I just wanted to tell you that I got my LSAT results. I scored a 174.

Dean broke into a grin.

“Hell yeah!” Charlie looked up from her own phone.

“What?”

“Sammy scored a 174 on his LSAT!” Charlie squealed.

“No way! That’s awesome!” She started typing a mile a minute on her phone as she walked into the kitchen. “Guys! Sam got a 174 on his LSAT!” Dean laughed and texted his brother back.

 **Dean [9:57am]:** I’m proud of you Sam. Where are you gonna go to law school?

 **Sammy [9:58am]:** Actually I have an interview here on Monday. I might have a shot at a full ride.

 **Dean [9:59am]:** That’s awesome! I’m at work right now, but I’ll call you tonight.

 **Sammy [10:00am]:** Cool. Have a good day Dean.

 **Dean [10:00am]:** You too

Dean put his phone back in his pocket just as the front door and kitchen door opened. Cas walked in.

“Hey, Cas,” Dean said as he was buried in hugs.

“Hello. Did I miss something?” Charlie spoke up.

“Dean’s brother basically got a perfect score on his LSAT!” Cas smiled.

“That’s great, Dean.” A few customers came in and everyone scattered to do their jobs. Jo handed Cas a nametag and an apron.

“Dean’ll show you the ropes. You can fill out the paperwork before you leave.”

“Okay.” Jo walked to the back. “Where does your brother go to school?” Cas asked as he slipped the apron over his head and tied it behind his back.

“Stanford,” Dean said, pride creeping into his voice. “He said he’s got a shot at a full ride.”

“You must be so proud of him.”

“I am. Oh, here. Charlie made your coffee and I saved you a scone.” Cas smiled.

“Oh. Thank you.”

“No problem. You can eat while I show you around.”

Dean gave Cas the standard tour, then led him back to the front counter. Cas listened quietly and asked a few questions every now and then. Dean could already tell he was going to be an asset.

“All right. I know Jo hired you as a server, but everyone’s first lesson is how to work the cash register. It’s pretty simple, but I’m gonna leave you with Charlie to shadow her for a little while. If you have any questions that she can’t answer, come find me. I’ll probably be somewhere around the oven.”

“Okay. Thank you, Dean.”

“No problem.” Dean smiled and ducked back into the kitchen.

“I like the new guy,” Benny said as Dean started gathering supplies.

“Yeah, he’s cool.”

“So, what do you think his deal is?” Dean looked up from his mixing bowl.

“What?”

“No one comes to this town on purpose. They end up here. So what do you think his deal is?” Dean shrugged.

“No idea. Maybe he just needed a change of scenery. It’s not really any of our business.”

Benny didn’t say anything else, but now Dean was curious. He was right. People didn’t come to Lebanon on purpose. Maybe Cas was running from something. Or to something. Or maybe he really did just want a change. Whatever Cas’s reason for being here was, it wasn’t anything Dean needed to concern himself with. So, of course, it stayed on his mind for the rest of the day.

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is complete and will be updated on Thursdays


End file.
